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art by goss

cover by Slodwick

Winter had slammed into them. White, cold, frozen. Landscape peeled out under his eyes, nothing but solid ice. Clark touched the pane of glass to feel the chill against his fingers.

If autumn was his weakness, then winter was his strength. It represented the security that only a home full of warm blankets and strong arms could provide. During childhood winters spent pillowed on his mother's breast or in his father's deep embrace, he had come to love the first content season of his life on earth.

It was something else entirely for Lex. His best friend, the man he loved, who looked out at the icy terrain with disgust and with, what only Clark understood, hidden fear. Lex had told him before what winter meant to him: cold mansions and even colder arms. Clark remembered those rare maudlin conversations and still flinched at the hint of self-loathing that would flash through Lex's grey eyes.

Clark flattened his palm to the windowpane, something he hadn't done since he was a child. He felt the cool press of the glass and pushed his gaze out to the white line of the horizon

Papers shuffling across the room drew his attention, but the creaking of the chair signaled that Lex was merely shifting his weight, changing his papers, not rising to spend time with Clark. Not yet.

Anticipation fell heavy in the chilled air of the mansion. The ancient stone had a way of letting the cold cling and linger despite the industrial-strength furnaces and the fires always stoked in nearly every room.

Clark leaned his forehead onto the frosted glass pane, closed his eyes on the scene before him and inhaled deeply. Even from across the room he could smell him, the scent of cologne and Lex-skin.

Clark could remember other scents. The sweet and homey smell of Chloe, the scent between her breasts. The soft chest that just last winter he had snuggled against and felt so safe. Safe and totally dispassionate. Like being in his mother's arms. Comfortable and barren of spark.

He could remember the way Lana had smelled, like a crisp apple. Remembered the scent of her hair, the brush of her slim fingers over his arms, down his chest. Again the surprise of no passion, the feeling of a brother for a sister, the wish for more. The dread of that meaning. He sometimes smelled her now when she would bend over to serve his coffee or to whisper something in his ear about school. He loved her scent because it reminded him of something that was genuine. Genuine and affectionate and - not for him.

He took another deep breath. Several months had passed now since that autumn day of reckoning. The day that autumn had tried for his soul and failed, but Lex's scent was still new to him. He'd smelled it for years but he'd not known what it meant to him. How could a kid know such things? He had been too young to be all that was required of him.

They were like the seasons. The beginning of their friendship had been like spring, full of expectations, the blush of flowers and new hope. But summer had been the heady, deep, hot disappointment of scorched earth. Lex had been disillusioned. Clark even more so because he knew that there was no way that he could be what they both needed. Not then. But autumn had come eventually, rebirth in the guise of death, and expectations were released. They had let them fly like leaves off the trees and embraced the blankness of the future. The white snow a clean slate on which to write something new. Together.

Clark listened to Lex shift at his desk as he pressed his forehead against the window, feeling the season creep into his skin.

He lifted his head from the window, but kept his eyes closed and held his ground when the chair scraped back from the desk and the soft sound of sock clad feet approached. Lex's body heat closed in behind him, not touching, then slipped around to his front. He felt a tension in Lex that shouldn't be there, not with him. But Clark was patient. Like snow, he had to wait for the melting.

Lex's hands were cold. He hadn't really expected that. Icy, long, firm fingers dug into the skin of his wrist, clasping and urging. Clark wanted to grab them between his palms and rub them warm. Instead he opened his eyes and gazed down into winter blue eyes, glinting with sparks. Sun on snow.

Lex's voice was warm, nearly teasing. "Tell me something, Clark."

"Sure." He'd tell him anything, anything at all.

"Tell me all of it." Lex's expression wasn't even challenging. They both knew he knew too much.

Clark looked away, back out to the winter and remembered the hot cocoa his mother would press into his chilled hands when he was a child. Not that the cold had bothered him even then. But the cocoa had been soothing. There was truth in that warmth, or warmth in that truth.

Clark knew that Lex was cold with lies. Winter could be so much more than this.

He studied the shift of light on the blowing drifts and spoke calmly, "I'm an alien."

Lex chortled softly and joked, "I'll spare no expense on your psychiatric treatment."

Clark nodded, keeping his eyes out on the landscape. Lex released his wrist and cold fingers climbed under Clark's shirt, digging, pressing insistently into his skin. Clark let his hand fall from the window, looked at the print left there, marking his presence in the bitter room.

Lex's fingers trailed up Clark's belly, over his chest, brushed his nipples, and finally roved back down to tuck themselves into the waistband of Clark's pants.

"Tell me more."

"How can I tell you more, when you won't accept what we both know is true?"

Lex shrugged and pressed his swollen hardness into Clark's thigh. Clark wasn't the only one who had been waiting.

Lex smirked a little and muttered, "It's cold in this room."

Clark wrapped his arms around Lex tightly, breathing into his neck words that were more important than the revelation of his secrets.

"I love you."

Lex murmured in response, "I think I've heard you mention that before," slipping his hands further into Clark's pants.

Clark gasped as frozen fingers brushed over his cock and then laughed softly. He gazed down into the icy depths of Lex's eyes looking up at him. He wondered how long until they melted into liquid heat.

In this season, the assured Lex of the autumn field shimmered on the verge of disappearing. Clark was finding out that Lex could be vulnerable too. It was comforting to know they both could need.

Clark nuzzled into Lex's pale neck, his cheeks scraping against the silk collar. He pulled back to ask, "Details later, Lex?"

A sharp glance up that would cut anyone else. Eyes that wouldn't let go and that held him there frozen in a moment that stretched for several seconds too long.

Intense eyes nearly climbing into him, Lex finally began, "If you think this changes how I feel..."

Clark smiled and interrupted, "No, I know."

Icy hands engulfed Clark's cock. They were always so good and tight with everything that had been missing in the crisp hands of Lana or the sweaty palms of Chloe. It was hard not to grind into Lex, not to pull him even closer and fuck his hand.

Toe to toe, Lex kissed Clark's jaw with lips that were warm and added soft, soft licks that cooled instantly.

"We both know what this means," Lex muttered, lips pressed to his throat.

"I've known since autumn." Clark was breathless with the sensations snaking up from his cock, shuddering through his spine.

"I'm cold." Lex whispered.

"You don't have to be."

Clark lowered his head to capture Lex's mouth between his lips and teased it open with his tongue. Lex melted against him. The scent of Lex filled his senses and the fingers on his skin, on his cock, were warming.

Backward, clumsy steps away from the window, with one eye closed and one eye open to navigate the room. Lex did not letting go and did not make it easy to move, mouth and hands locked onto Clark with the tenacity of a heat-seeking missile.

He pushed on toward the couch. Clark barely noticed the guttural sounds in his throat, too wrapped up in the responding moans from Lex.

Finally, seeing the couch in his peripheral vision, Clark made a move and landed himself on the leather cushions, pulling Lex on top of him. He ran his hands up and down Lex's back, willing the friction to warm him. Clark toed off his sneakers and rubbed his white cotton socks over Lex's silky, socked feet.

Lex disentangled his hand from Clark's boxers and pants before he knelt, straddling Clark's hips. He rode Clark's gentle grinds as he worked the buttons free on the blue cotton shirt. Clark grasped Lex's hips and pushed him down onto his groin. Lex's fingers brushed against Clark's belly as they moved down, button by button.

Lex pushed the shirt away and smoothed his hands over Clark's chest. Soft sparks echoed through Clark as Lex brushed over his nipples. Clark released Lex's hips and lifted up to help slip his shirt off completely.

Lex bent and pressed his face to Clark's neck. Clark moaned as Lex breathed him in, the intimacy touching him someplace deep inside. Lex's lips clamped down on the ticklish spot at Clark's neck and shoulder and he trembled as Lex sucked ruthlessly there, never able to mark no matter how hard he tried. Clark regretted that as much as Lex. Maybe more.

Lex pulled back. Clark found the buttons of Lex's shirt and managed to get enough undone to pull it up and over his head. Oh. Why was he always in awe? Every time. His breath hitched. The white expanse of soft skin reminded him of the snowy landscape he'd been studying earlier, with similar hills and valleys, shadows and glimmering brightness.

His hands surveyed Lex's skin, mapping it. He was tempted to shift his focus just a little, just to peek at the sinew and bones that held Lex together. Red muscle, white bone, cream tendon, dark pulsing heart and darker blood -- realized he had glimpsed inside despite himself. The intimacy of the view overwhelmed to him and he couldn't resist pulling Lex down, chest to chest, skin to skin.

He felt again that this was it, the big it, the one some people never found. And this it was there between them and in them. He'd known it for years, felt it clasp and then release them, but not now - now, they could and would move into these sensations, this bonding, this moment.

Lex ground down on him and he would have blushed even a year ago at his responsive moan; instead his hands sought Lex's belt buckle, pant's button, and zipper. He fought not to destroy them in his urgency. He ignored the little chuckles from Lex at his trembling hands. He couldn't afford to hear that smooth, honeyed voice that would slide down his spine to his cock. He needed to get their clothes off, it was urgent.

Lex was helping now, his cool hands running under the waistband of Clark's jeans, opening the button, unzipping. Clark accomplished his mission with the slide of a zipper and Lex lifted up to allow Clark to push the trousers over slim hips, down strong thighs and Lex kicked them the rest of the way off, then used his toes to push his black silk socks off.

Lex's hands were scrambling at his jeans and Clark lifted up enough for Lex to slip them down with his boxers. His cock bobbed free and the look on Lex's face, the possessive hunger, marked Clark more thoroughly than the desperate attempts at kiss marks ever could. He whimpered when Lex's eyes lifted to his own. Liquid, hot, swirling with lust and Clark wanted to hold all of that.

Clark couldn't stop himself from grabbing him, shifting and rolling them until Lex was beneath him. Couldn't stop himself from thrusting into Lex's pelvis as he wriggled free of his jeans. Lex's wicked smile: a reward for his impatience.

Clark had to bury his head, had to thrust wildly against Lex. He growled at the responsive reaction of Lex's hands stroking down his back, cupping his ass. He spread his thighs a little and felt Lex caress into his crevice to brush against his entrance with tender strokes. He shuddered. The world had shrunk, everything reduced to him and Lex, their scent, their taste, the sounds they made together, the slap of skin on skin, the desire arcing between them. Clark might not be able to breathe in a few minutes, might have to hold his breath until this passion was spent. It was all too much.

Lex pressed his body up and gasped into Clark's ear, the sound rushing to his cock. Shaking with need, Clark lifted up to turn Lex over. He caught his breath at the pale, stark ass and sleek long back. He wasn't even close to being used to this, to being sated with Lex's body. He knelt between Lex's thighs and ran palms over his ass. Lex's full body shiver didn't go unnoticed and Clark unfolded the soft green quilted blanket from the back of the couch, tucking it around Lex's upper body, leaving his legs and ass exposed. Lex murmured his approval and Clark felt cool feet brushing over his calves as he bent forward, spreading Lex's cheeks.

Clark leaned in and caressed Lex's asshole with his tongue. The taste musky and strong, something he associated with Lex and only the most intimate of moments. Lex's choked curse and body shudder was all the encouragement he needed. Lapping gently, working at the opening with soft strokes, holding Lex's hips still as he writhed beneath him, Clark steadily reduced Lex to a whimpering, moaning, shuddering wreck. Defenses down, opening beneath his tongue.

He pulled back and studied flushed pale skin. He knew that Lex's chest and back would be glowing, that his neck would be hot. He glanced up to confirm that, yes, Lex's were lips softly opened, eyes closed and waiting. Clark's cock jerked, wanting him to just fuck Lex, urging him on with flexes and drops of liquid sliding over the head. Wondered if he could hold out long enough to make Lex beg. Gently nudged his face back between Lex's cheeks and twirled the tongue around his hole. Lex warbled and whined and pushed back against his tongue. Clark suctioned his mouth to Lex's opening and stroked his tongue in and out slowly. Lex finally tried to rut against the sofa, but was held fast by Clark's hands on his hips.

Broken and wanting, Lex whimpered, "Fuck me. Fuck me now."

Clark pulled back and reached for his jeans. He fumbled for the packet of lubricant in his front pocket. Clark couldn't stop his smile as he watched Lex hump into the sofa, trying take the edge off. He glanced up at Lex's face, half buried in the back of the couch from his struggles with Clark's tongue at his ass, and found Lex's eyes clenched shut, face flushed in heat, lips red from biting them in the effort not to cry out.

Lex, his Lex with his ever-present restraint momentarily shattered.

Fingers and cock slicked, Clark gazed at the inviting ass. He gently moved several fingers into Lex and smiled as Lex pushed back on them.

Lex growled, "Not enough. More. Now".

Clark pulled his fingers free of the heat threatening to just drag them in. He wiped the excess lubricant against the blanket covering Lex's back then pushed the blanket away as he lifted Lex's hips. He found the angle and pressed in with infinite care, gently, fighting his urge to hurry.

Lex's lips went slack and his eyes shut as Clark pushed in. The slip of Clark's cock head past the stretched muscle shook Clark deeply. The exquisite pleasure of the first press into a lover and the bliss of orgasm, both sensations nearly unbearable and overwhelming to him, the closest he could come to physical pain.

Lex tried to rock back, but Clark held him steady and looked down between them at the tight stretch of Lex's ass around his cock. God, so beautiful...looking at himself in Lex, obscene and gorgeous and, Christ, so fucking hot. Lex grabbed the arm of the sofa, white knuckled as he squirmed. Begging Clark for more, gripping against the cock half-sheathed in him, urgently kicking his heels against Clark's ass until, finally, Clark couldn't hold still any more.

He rocked forward and moaned as he slid into Lex, the next several inches disappearing as Lex clenched around him. The deep sounds of Lex's pleasure raced over Clark's nerves, and through his bloodstream. He struggled against his urges as he fought not to rush, not to thrust hard and bury himself to the hilt. He failed miserably as he focused on the beat of Lex's pulse on his cock, the strong, rhythmic jolts that could probably bring him off without even moving. Clark moved in more, rocking harder than he intended, one hard press until he was completely buried in Lex.

Clark paused to let Lex adjust a little before lowering Lex's hips and following him down. He twined his legs around Lex's beneath him, covered Lex's back with his chest, found his hands and gripped them in his own. Clark, more at ease now that he was fucking Lex, moved his hips with long, slow thrusts.

Lex's breath was shallow with Clark's weight on him. Clark bent low and nuzzled into Lex's neck, sucking hard, wanting to mark. The reaction to the harsh kiss was a shimmy and a tight clamping around him, a deep moan and finally Lex was begging him in words.

"Please, Clark, please, I need to come... Jesus."

Clark ignored him. He wanted this closeness to last, wanted to fuck Lex for hours, for years, for-fucking-ever. He shifted to find a fresh spot of neck and suckled another kiss into the skin. Lex whimpered and squirmed beneath him, trying to press up for a harder fuck. Clark continued to stroke languidly, wondering how far he could push Lex before his own need became too much for him and he fucked him through the sofa. Groaning, Lex started rutting into the couch beneath him.

Clark murmured a harsh, "No," in Lex's ear before he released Lex's hands and gripped his hips stopping the movement.

Lex made a choking sound of dissatisfaction. Clark was getting close to losing control. He noted with relief when Lex's conceded pale, wiry body relaxed and took Clark with no struggle, just moans and whimpers and the frantic, but sweetly whispered, "Please...please...oh, please..."

Clark's brain shorted out and he began to pump in earnest. Lex grunted in relief beneath him, the sound only serving to break Clark's control entirely. He knelt up, pulling Lex with him, arms around his waist, holding him tight to his chest, burying his face into that smooth neck as he fucked deep and hard into Lex's receptive body. Lex reached one arm around to twine into Clark's hair, gripping hard and holding Clark's face to his neck, riding out the hard thrusts. He reached for his own cock with his other hand and shuddering hard, he quickly stroked himself off. Clark pressed up into clenching heat of Lex's orgasm.

Clark bucked up and up and up and up. He felt the walls breaking in his psyche, images of Lex flooding his mind as he crashed hard. He spasmed in him...cock throbbing and pulsing, he couldn't stop his hurt noises and he closed his eyes to blue and green dots. God, so fucking good.

He drifted down from the high of orgasm and settled Lex back onto the couch, both of them still panting and pre-verbal. He cuddled Lex, determined to keep him warm and naked. The fire across the room was sputtering and threatening to go out. Even in his half-conscious state he started searching the room for a clean blanket, relieved to see one folded across the back of the big leather chair next to them. He could have it and be back in an instant.

He rolled Lex to the side and murmured, "Don't be startled...it's just part of the details. I'll be right back."

He was back in a blink with the blanket, the wind from his movement leaving Lex shivering. He pulled the blanket tight around them both and rested his head on Lex's chest.

"Neat trick." Lex commented, amused.

Clark held Lex close. He watched the daylight drift into darkness in the short winter day, the firelight in the room flickering around them both.

"Details now, Lex?"

Lex's hand in his hair, brushing, soothing before he said with sleepy authority, "Later. We've got time."

Clark sighed and threw a leg over Lex's hips, closed his eyes and drifted drowsily.

No rush here. It was going to be okay. Lex knew everything and they were stuck with each other now.

So, yeah, they had time. They had all winter...and then some.

They had forever, even

.