That was the good thing about having Sandburg around. The kid understood him, saw through Jim completely and, now, had given up everything to be with Jim. It was the ultimate sacrifice and the ultimate pledge. Jim had finally admitted to himself that the bond between them was a permanent one and based on a deeper love than he’d ever known before. It was time to up the ante. Time to make his own pledge.

And so he’d had Simon speak the words and Blair had agreed; the expression on his face when giving his answer proving, yet again, that they could communicate with each other on levels beyond words. They understood each other completely.

Now, back at the loft, Blair hung his jacket on the peg and yawned. “It’s been a long week. I think I’m going to hit the sack. Take a little afternoon siesta.”

Good idea. Blair always had the best ideas.

Jim followed him to the room that Blair called home, taking deep, relaxing breaths full of Blair’s scent. The room was permeated with it and it felt warm, nice, homey, right. Blair looked over his shoulder at Jim, rather warily, when he stepped over the boundary. It was a good idea to start here, in this room, where Blair felt safe and Jim could lose himself in all the Blair-things.

Blair kicked off his hiking boots and started unbuttoning his shirt, looking at Jim with eyes full of questions. Jim smiled and began taking off his own shirt, fingers deftly pushing the buttons through the soft fabric.

Blair looked suddenly confused and then laughed a little. “Uh, what’s up, big guy? Planning on joining me in my nap or something?”

“Yes.”

“Oh.”

And Sandburg at a loss for words was priceless and beautiful. Utterly gorgeous. So Jim just let his shirt drop to the floor, starting on his belt. Jim guessed that Blair hadn’t expected things to move so quickly. After all, it took them three years to get this far, he supposed Sandburg thought they’d take our time. But after finally figuring it all out and getting up the nerve to ask Blair to be his official and permanent partner, Jim didn’t want to wait. He wanted to have it all out on the table.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Sandburg held his hands out obviously confused. “Wait a minute, buddy. Uh, not that I mind taking a nap with you or anything, sounds kind of nice, I suppose. You’re probably warm and stuff, and I’m always fucking freezing, but, uh, I’ve just gotta ask you one thing, first, okay?”

Jim pulled his belt through the loops and dropped it on the floor beside his shirt. “Shoot, Chief.”

Blair’s eyes were huge as he followed Jim’s hands to the button on his pants and watched him undo it. “Um, okay, so my question is—” Blair gasped when Jim pulled his pants and boxers down in one quick move, kicking them toward the belt and shirt. “—what the fuck is going on here?”

Okay, that didn’t sound good. That sounded like panic and a whole lot of confusion. Hmm. Not exactly what he’d expected from the guy who’d promised him his entire life back at the station. Maybe Blair was having second thoughts. Jim looked down at his own naked body and frowned. Or maybe Blair didn’t like what he saw.

“I’m not what you were expecting, Chief?”

“What?” Blair sputtered and coughed and his eyes bugged out of his head.

“My body. Not what you were expecting?”

Blair shook his head in total confusion. “I’ve seen this all before. I’d know what to expect, if I was expecting to see your body at all!

Jim frowned and said, “Wait. You’re saying you weren’t expecting this?” He reached for his boxers and pulled them back on clumsily, embarrassment stinging his cheeks.

“Okay, Jim, big guy, buddy—” Blair began to pace in the limited space between his futon and his desk. “I don’t know if I’ve just stepped into an alternate reality where nothing makes sense, or if Naomi slipped me some LSD at lunch, or if you’ve lost your mind, or if I’m dreaming, or if I’m just totally missing a huge chunk of this picture, but, uh, no, man, I wasn’t expecting you to disrobe in my bedroom.” Blair’s hands flew through the air, punctuating each sentence. “Not that it isn’t kind of nice, and not that I’m not flattered and, surprisingly, turned on,” Blair’s expression reflected that he was indeed rather surprised by this, “but I really, really wasn’t expecting it. Should I have been? What clue did I miss? I don’t remember ingesting drugs today—”

Jim grabbed Blair’s arm and stopped his pacing. “So, you didn’t agree to be my official and permanent partner at the station?”

Blair shook his head, mouth gaping. “Well, hell, yeah, I did. But, uh, do you fuck all of your official and permanent partners?”

Jim frowned. “So you didn’t understand what I was really asking?”

“Huh? What? No. There was something more there that included getting naked?” Blair didn’t seem really opposed to getting naked, which Jim took as a good sign, more just confused about why they would be getting naked.

“I asked you to be my permanent and official partner. I thought you’d understand.”

Blair tore at his hair. “Understand what, man? I’m sorry. I must be especially stupid today. Talk in small words.”

“I love you.” Jim blushed, feeling the tips of his ears turn red.

Blair nodded. “Okay. Okay, I can deal with that. You love me.” Blair took a deep breath, looking thoughtful. “Yes, okay. You love me. Well, okay. I love you, too. Great. But, uh, how the fuck was I supposed to decipher that from Simon asking me to be your partner?”

Jim shrugged. “You usually understand me.”

“Are you insane? I never understand you! You are like the most confusing and exasperating individual I’ve ever met in my fucking life! You think I understand you?”

Jim shrugged. “Sure. You know me. You know why I do things, how I do things.” This wasn’t going as expected at all. Jim was starting to have second thoughts, starting to wonder if he’d completely mishandled the whole thing. It wouldn’t be the first time, especially when it came to Sandburg.

Blair groaned and sank down onto his bed. “Goddamn, I need a nap.”

Jim bent to pick up his clothes, preparing to leave. He felt kind of sick to his stomach, but he wasn’t heart-broken. He knew that it would all work out. This was just a hitch, another of their patented misunderstandings. It was a disappointment to learn that he’d been wrong about Blair understanding what had happened at the station but he knew that if he went upstairs and got into his bed, that it would only be a matter of time before he heard footsteps on the risers and Blair’s voice saying, “Jim we need to talk.” And then the game would be back on. He could wait. He’d learned a lot about waiting in his life.

Blair was breathing hard, muttering under his breath, “Insane, totally nuts, bonkers, wacko, fucking gone around the goddamn bend.”

When Jim turned toward the door, he was startled to hear Blair say, “Stay.”

Looking back, Blair sat on the bed with huge eyes. “Just stay, man. Get in the bed, come on. We’ll figure this one out.”

Jim nodded, dropped his clothes again and crawled onto the futon, which was surprisingly soft and cushiony. Every rustle of movement released wonderful Blair-ness in to the air and he nearly drowned in a cloud of it when he dropped onto the pillow. Blair finished divesting himself of his clothing, until he wore only boxers, too, still muttering about Jim’s lack of sanity, but he climbed under the covers and let Jim spoon him.

It was nice. Blair’s hair in his face; Blair’s firm body pressed against his own. Nice. Understatement had always been his forte. He stroked his hand over Blair’s hair, smoothing it away from his face and then burrowed his nose against Blair’s sweet-smelling neck. Nice. Yeah. Very nice.

“Did Simon propose to Carolyn for you, too?”

“Hmm?”

Blair sighed, twisted in Jim’s arms and said, “Never mind, you big idiot” before pressing his lips to Jim’s in a tender kiss.

Yeah. Nice. Very nice.

The End